People lie or simply change their minds. Others tell you what they think you want to hear. Only what one does to formalize their promises matters in courts. We often hear about promises of inheritance and commitments to relationships that someone made prior to death. Increasingly, as folks live together without legally formalizing their relations through a marriage, the surviving partner can be left with nothing, even though they contributed financially and personally for years in the relationship. Unless they were named as a beneficiary in a will, trust, or assets, promises of where that would go are meaningless.
Unless the relationship was formalized by marriage, the surviving partner has no rights based upon the relationship alone. Few states recognize a “palimony right,” yet in nearly every estate case we have, we hear about promises that were never formalized. The failure to formalize promises only results in the heartbreak of a broken promise because our courts cannot simply rely on one testimony of what was promised by the decedent. We can assist those who make promises and want to keep them by formalizing the promises in an estate plan. As far formalizing a personal relationship, that would involve a pastor, priest, or justice of the peace. Just don’t assume things will all work out as you hoped after you have passed. You won’t be around then to keep your promise.